Wednesday, September 02, 2015

Last name or lasting name

I was in Std 10, and it was time to submit our details to the board. This was also the time where if there was any change in the name, we could do it, since that would be the name which would appear in the mark sheets, and these mark sheets were going to be an important document in our future. My name was absolutely fine, it was my last name which I wanted to get changed. It had so happened that in one of the previous schools, when they were to give my transfer certificate (TC), they cut short my last name to an initial. It stayed that way and we never bothered to change it. I was also ok with it, and dint bother much until this time.

So my name instead of was shortened to abc.N

I filled the form where I said my name was to be changed to What senior faculty in my school told me at that time baffled me. He said, why bother to change your name, anyway after marriage you will change your last name.

I don’t know what was in my mind at that time I replied to him “Sir, I might not really change it at that point”. He laughed it off and went his way.

I dint really submit that form at that point, as I was a little disturbed with this conversation.

Anyway years later, when we were about to get married, I discussed this point with G and told him that I will not change my last name, and I am glad he was ok with it. Infact, he said it was my name, and what I wanted to do with my last name, was his wish. I was dreading, if he hadn’t agreed, I would have to fight with him for the same. I even joked to him once saying, if he was ready to take my name as his last name, then I would take his name as my last name too. I don’t remember what was the response. I think we both must have thought “Yeah!! Right!!!”

There have been many people who have questioned me on why I still haven’t changed my last name. And my response is always “Why should I?”. And this is something which my husband and me have to discuss about or choose not to bother about. So who are you to ask me?

I don’t remember very well, why I thought of putting this incident on my blog, but this incident has always nagged me. As teachers, we expect them to give us certain values. This might have been a small incident in my life, but what if the same person had told me, why are you studying, all you are going to do is get married and stay at home serving your husband. How would that have affected my life? Would I have questioned my “Sir”? or would I have kept quiet?

Thanks to my parents and my in-laws for not asking me to change my last name. Its not that I would have changed it. But, yes it surely saved some melodrama in the house J


Bubblegum.... said...

I had and still have this confusion but if you REALLY REALLY ask me what do I want to do. I would never change my surname - that is the plain blunt answer!

Art said...

Yeah.. even if somebody came to me for an advice on this topic (why would anybody come to me is beyond my imagination.. but if they do), I would tell them not to change the name :)